Friday, July 3, 2020

If you want things to be different then you have to do something different

If you keep doing what you are doing you are going to keep getting what you are getting. If you want things to change then make a change. Life has no remote control so you have to get up and change it yourself. If you want anything to be different you will have to do something different, otherwise it's the same old thing just a different day. Remember the definition to insanity is to keep doing things the same way and expecting a different result. Without a change nothing will change. If you know it's time for a change then stop wasting your time. Some situations require you to have to make major changes but most of the time, with a few tweaks and minor changes it can make all the difference in the world. Before you know what needs to change you have to be totally honest with yourself about what has to change. Change can be hard and sometimes painful but nothing is more painful than staying stuck somewhere that you don't belong. Before you celebrate INDEPENDENCE DAY, make the changes that are necessary for you to be able to celebrate the personal independence free from things that were holding you down. A change will do you good so for goodness sake JUST CHANGE IT.

Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Don't let their opinions change who you are

We each as individuals are unique. You can have things in common with others but we are all totally different from each other. We each have our own opinions. It is okay to listen to other people's opinions but the only opinion that matters is yours. You can't keep changing who you are to please others because then you are no longer yourself. You decide what is best for you because you are the only one who has to live with the consequences of your decisions. You decide whether you are honest or not just like you decide what to eat for dinner. Just because other people are doing it doesn't mean it's the right thing for you to do. You won't be comfortable in the skin you are in unless you are comfortable with what you are doing in the skin you are in. If you want people to know you as a honest, hard working person who is compassionate, then be honest, hard working and compassionate. Like the sign I saw said... Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

Monday, June 29, 2020

Choose your battles

You don't have to win every battle to win a war. Choose what is worth fighting for because sometimes PEACE is better than being right. Compromise let's everyone win. With a little give and take you can both get what you need. Working together gets a whole lot more accomplished then playing tug of war against each other, and nothing gets accomplished. Neither of you can get everything you want but you both can get everything you need. You can be stubborn about your goals but you have to be flexible about how you can achieve them. As long as there is compromise then your goals won't be compromised.

Friday, June 26, 2020

You won't know which way to go until you know where you want to go to

You have to decide where you want to go before you can choose which way to go. You can't just sign up for college until you decide what degree you need to get the kind of job you want when you graduate. You won't know what direction to go on the highway until you decide where you are going. You can't reach your goals unless you set goals for yourself. Your dreams can't come true if you don't have dreams. If you get knocked down in life you have to either stay down or get up. You may have not have been able to prevent yourself from falling down but whether you stay down or not, is your choice. Sometimes it takes you falling down lower than you have ever been to stand back up taller and stronger than you ever were. Sometimes it takes a tornado to get you where you are supposed to be because it was the only way to get you there. It's hard to understand but growing pains are painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don't belong.

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Have you heard the phrase, my way or the highway?

I hadn't heard the saying, it's my way or the highway, in a long time. So when I heard it I was surprised. There are many things from decades past that have become common and popular again. I never thought I would see bell bottom pants come back in style, but they have. Unfortunately none of us, or at least I didn't, save any items for four decades until they would become popular again. When I see someone wearing styles like I did four decades ago it brings a ton of visual memories that make me smile. When I hear "old phrases" from time to time, it brings up many happy memories for me to enjoy. Our minds are full of buried memories that are forgotten and they won't be remembered unless something triggers them. I have always enjoyed walking around a flea market where old memories can be triggered as I look at what people are selling. I don't have to buy anything, I just have to see an object that triggers a forgotten memory suddenly vivid front and center in my mind. One day I saw an old lamp exactly like the one my aunt had in her home. Instantly many memories of time spent at her house flooded in my mind that made me smile from ear to ear. I felt bad when the lady selling it thought for sure I was going to buy it after spending so much time staring at it while I was reliving memories with a big smile on my face. I stroll through the many ailes of the flea market enjoying all the buried memories that all the random objects trigger. Each time I go there I never know which relative or friend I will get to spend time with.

Monday, June 22, 2020

You don't have to have the answer you just have to listen

It's sad when you see someone going through a rough time and there is nothing you can do to help and you have no advice to give them. But that doesn't mean you can't help them get through it. If you just take the time to listen to them, it helps. If you listen long enough it helps them feel better. If you just allow them to share their story and respond with empathy and understanding, it helps them. You don't have to have the answer you just have to take the time to listen. It's possible as they tell you they not only feel better but they see the "whole picture" and see an answer to their problem. You don't have to be a doctor to make someone feel better, you just have to be a compassionate person and take the time to listen to them. They say laughter is the best medicine and you can give it away for free.

Friday, June 19, 2020

Father's day is the day you let your father know how much you love him

To be a parent is a hard job. As a parent there is nothing you wouldn't do for your children. Letting your Father know how special he is to you, means more to him than any child will ever know. We are just  twenty seven hours away from making the day all about him to show him how special he is to us. As I helped my grandkids make cards for their Father you could feel the love that they had for him. When your children are little they just beam from the inside out with love that is easily seen and felt. The quarantine may keep some people from being able to physically visit their Fathers this year. That doesn't mean you can't talk to him so he can feel your love. Time talking about memories you two have shared will still allow him to feel your love. For those of us who's Father's are no longer with us, you can still think about memories you shared with him and feel his love. And if there is truth that their spirits are still here with us, he will feel your love. Happy Father's day to every Father.

Wednesday, June 17, 2020

Don't stunt your growth

You have no choice in how tall you are. But you can stunt your "personal growth." How you VIEW yourself, NOT how other people VIEW you, will decide whether you personally grow where you are planted. If you only focus on your faults, you can't see your many strengths on which you have to build on. The only way to make the "most of what you got" is to realize what you actually have first. You don't have to be good at everything, you just have to be good at everything that you decide to do. People are entitled to their own opinions but the only opinion that matters is your opinion. Your personal growth depends on whether you let yourself grow naturally without stunting your personal growth. You have what it takes, the only question is, will you use what you have? 

Monday, June 15, 2020

Everytime you think of it, you feel the pain

Take the painful experiences from your past and JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind. Keeping it FRESH on your mind won't allow you to HEAL. Everytime you relive it in your mind, it hurts you. Once was bad enough. You can't STOP the painful memories from popping up but you can JUST FLUSH IT quickly out of your mind so it can't hurt you again and again. You can't forget it but you can choose to never relive it again. By the same token, if you enjoyed a past experience you should plan on doing it again. Choosing to do the things that evoke happy feelings and AVOID anything that evokes negative feelings. Your thoughts make up the "REALITY" you live. You can't have a feeling without a thought. Remember Peter Pan couldn't FLY until he thought of happy thoughts. There are times in life when the only way to have a good day is to FLUSH AWAY a bad day. Peace of mind really is JUST a FLUSH away, so JUST FLUSH IT. To have peace of mind you got to make room for it to get in.

Friday, June 12, 2020

If the answer is no then don't say yes

Don't say yes to someone when you know you have no intentions of doing it. An honest NO does far less damage. If you say yes then they stop looking for another way to get what they need done. If you would have just been honest and said no, they would have kept looking for a way to get it done. Don't say it if you don't mean it. There is nothing wrong telling someone NO. But saying yes when you know darn well that there is NO chance you would do it, is wrong. By the same token you can't overwhelm yourself with more than you can actually do by saying yes to everyone. If it is honestly more than you can handle then tell them NO, I would if I could but I just can't. You can't honestly say yes if the honest answer is NO. They may not like the answer but regardless they will appreciate an honest answer. If you tell them yes then keep your word. Like they say, A person is only as good as his word.

Wednesday, June 10, 2020

We all want it but who will get it?

Everyone wants to feel loved. You may have a lot of love in your heart but can anyone feel it? Just because you think that they know you love them, doesn't mean they feel your love. You need to tell them and show them how much you love them so they can feel it. If you don't, then they won't. No one will know what you are thinking if you don't tell them what you are thinking. You may have a lot of love in your heart but can anyone feel it? Ask yourself that question when you are with those who you love, then make sure they can feel it.

Monday, June 8, 2020

What businesses will be open after the quarantine ends?

For months we have had to shutdown everything to stop the spread of covid19. It has been devastating economically and emotionally frustrating. When will they be able to begin to recover? Who knows how much longer some of the local business will suffer financially before they are forced to close their doors for good. Some communities will suffer far more than they can endure. After the quarantine is over every business that closed will be less jobs available for those living in those communities. Running down to get what you need from stores that were usually open, won't be possible due to them closing.  If you want your local stores to be open you have to support them now so that they will be. We will be better budgeters and more thrifty than we have been over the past few decades. We would replace items not because they were broke but because we wanted the new style. Hopefully we will remain more thrifty after we recover so we are in less unnecessary burden of debt to carry.

Friday, June 5, 2020

Compromise takes communication

You have to compromise to make things work for everyone involved. You have to each communicate what you need to figure out a compromise that works for both of you. You can't be one sided when you aren't the only one involved. Well I guess you can but you won't get anywhere if you can't do it alone. Working it out so that things work out takes communication and compromise. To be a team it takes teamwork. You can only get what you need if they get what they need. Otherwise no one gets what they need because it takes a team effort so you have to work together that's why it is called teamwork. If you need a team to do it then be a team player.

Wednesday, June 3, 2020

Don't let anyone or anything suck the JOY out of you

To enjoy life while you are living you have to enjoy it while you are living it, even during a pandemic. I have heard countless stories from many people of memories created with their families as they spent time together during the quarantine. And for many people their families had not spent quality family time together in years, unless it was a Holiday. So although the pandemic has hurt us all, months together has bonded families that wouldn't have been possible if it hadn't happened. It's hard to see anything positive about a pandemic. But if you want to enjoy life while you are living in a pandemic, you have to look for anything positive that you can find. As the quarantine is nearing it's end, don't let the regular family time end with it.

Monday, June 1, 2020

We can agree to disagree and continue the conversation

They may be family but that doesn't mean you will agree on everything. They can be a good friend even though they can be very different from you. You might not like everything about your job, but still like your job. Your dog is still your best friend even though they may chew on your favorite pair of shoes. Just because someone doesn't see what you see doesn't mean they didn't see something completely different. Ten people could see the same thing yet each one see something different. There is no wrong answer when you are asked your opinion on something. Your point of view is the only view you can see and their point of view is the only one they can see. You don't have to agree with someone to get along, you just have to agree to disagree and change the subject. If you want to have a right to your opinion you have to respect other people's opinions. My favorite uncle and I have very different opinions on a lot of things yet we are super close. We know the subjects that we disagree on and we both agree to change the subject whenever they come up. There are plenty of other things to talk about. The subjects we can't talk about we each talk to other people about. Choosing to agree to disagree is followed by choosing to change the subject.

Friday, May 29, 2020

A drive thru experience we will never forget

Do you remember your senior year of high school? Do you remember your senior prom? Do you remember Graduation night? You may not remember everything about your senior year but there are many special memories that you created during your senior year. I want to say CONGRATULATIONS to the CLASS of 2020. Today we had my son's DRIVE THRU GRADUATION. It wasn't a traditional graduation by no means. As the music played we drove through the parking lot
where we were greeted by heartfelt signs being held by the teachers and their families. Every teacher we passed would call him by name and shout CONGRATULATIONS at a social distance. With tears of pride flowing down my cheeks as we were near the end of the line, I said to my son, WOW you only have six teachers yet I heard at least twenty of them shout out your name. He said Mom that's because you have a sign with my name on it hanging from your rearview mirror. I had totally forgotten that they said hang your GRADUATES name on your windshield. Even though it was right in front of me hanging. After we left our DRIVE THRU GRADUATION we got in the line at a DRIVE THRU restaurant to celebrate. It may not have been a "traditional Graduation" but my son is officially a 2020 GRADUATE! 

Wednesday, May 27, 2020

If you earned it they can't take that from you but they can...

If you earned it, no one can take that from you. Forever it will be a fact that you earned it. Unfortunately it is also a fact that there are things, people and circumstances that can prevent you from reaping the benefits that you have earned. Even so, you still earned it, and you know it. They can't take away that fact nor can they take away the pride you have in yourself for all your hard work to earn it. Being proud of what you have done and what you will do is a priceless benefit that they can never take from you. Don't focus on what you didn't get or you won't be able to enjoy what you got. Don't focus on what you are not good at, no one is good at everything. Don't lose focus on what you are good at so you can figure out how to use that to your advantage. You can either be your biggest cheerleader or your worst enemy. Your thoughts make up the reality that you live, not what others think about you. All you have to do to be comfortable in the skin you are in, is if you are comfortable with what you do in the skin you are in. Being proud of who you are only comes from being proud of what you have done. 

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

You will get wet in the rain but you know we need the rain

As I was running around doing my errands today, I was in and out in the rain. It wasn't fun but I know we need the rain. The puddles of rain in the parking lot made it impossible to keep my shoes dry, but I know we need the rain. As I arrived home I could hear the birds chirping as they bathed in the puddles. I know they were happy it was a rainy day. Later as I sat out on my porch I could hear the frogs as they came out of their hiding spots to cool off in the puddles. The flowers that were wilting from the heat earlier were now standing tall as they soaked up some rainwater. Now I was relaxing enjoying the benefits that the rain brings, no longer thinking about how miserable it had been earlier because of the rain. There are good points and bad points on a rainy day. But at the end of the day we need the rain. The good points about the rain far out way the bad points. In life you make good decisions if you base your decisions on whether the good out weighs the bad that will come from your decision. If it doesn't, then DON'T do it. By weighing your options, you don't weight yourself down and carry it with you on your life's journey.

Monday, May 25, 2020

You know if you don't leave a scab alone then your cut can't heal

In order to heal from any physical health issues you know it takes time to heal and feel better. It doesn't happen in an instant. Nor will you heal if you don't do what your doctor says. You certainly need to avoid it from physically ever happening again if it is possible. Other issues you may face on your life's journey affect your mental health negatively. Don't keep reliving it over and over again in your mind so it can hurt you again and again. Take the painful experiences from your past and JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind so it can't do any more damage to you. Keeping it FRESH on your mind won't allow you to "HEAL" from it. Once was enough! There will be times on your life's journey that in order to have a "GOOD DAY" you will have to "FLUSH AWAY A BAD DAY."

Friday, May 22, 2020

Obviously you know you can't please everyone....

You learn at a young age that you can't please everyone, no matter how hard you may try. Throughout your life you find yourself in situations where you are performing a juggling act to not let those around you down. It's hard to be someone in the middle of situations knowing no matter what you do, you can't please everyone which usually means someone is going to be disappointed. Your only choice is to make sure you are pleased with whatever you choose to do or choose not to do. You can't always please everyone but you got to ALWAYS please yourself. At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is if you are proud of yourself for the choices you make. You won't be happy in the skin you are in unless you are happy with what you do in the skin you are in. If it makes you happy then you will be happy. If someone else is unhappy about the decision that you made does it really matter as long as you are happy? You knew before you made your decision that you can't please everyone but you can please yourself. That's why if it makes you happy then you know you made the right decision for you.

Wednesday, May 20, 2020

If you know what you want it may sometimes require you to put your blinders on

Of course you need to look at things with an open mind. You need to look at it from every angle. Depending on how you look at it will determine what you see in order for you to know what you should do. Then make the necessary plans of the path you need to take to get where you want to go in Life. The path may be bumpy along your journey to get where you want to be but as long as you stay on the path you will get there. There will be a few that will tell you to give up if you fall, but everybody falls off their bycicle many times while they are learning to ride a bycicle. You don't give up because you know the end result is you will know how to ride a bike. Make little goals that will be the steps you will need to reach bigger goals that you have planned for your life's journey. Your dreams are made with your mind wide open and then you put your blinders on to prevent anyone or anything from distracting you from reaching them. Your dreams can't come true if you don't have any dreams. You can't reach your goals if you don't set goals for yourself. Along your journey in Life there will be twist and turns as well as bumps along your path. But as long as you stay on the path you will get where you need to be. The first step is choosing where you want to go. The second step is choosing the path you will have to take to get there. The third step is to put your blinders on so no one or nothing can distract you from getting there.

Monday, May 18, 2020

We are all affected even if we are not infected

The covid19 virus will affect every one, even though not everyone will become infected with covid19. The economical damages have also created unhealthy personal damages that can't be fixed simply by finally getting a paycheck. Getting settled back in will take time. Finding a way to regroup after a pandemic is hard when you are still living with the unknowns that the pandemic has in store for our future. Whatever the future brings is what future plans we will regroup and make to stand strong again. One day at a time, one phase at a time, one step at a time we will all win the war against covid19. My son is a 2020 graduate and although he missed out on a lot of things that most seniors do, he will be forever part of the story of the pandemic of 2020. This fact doesn't help him much but it is a fact that will never be forgotten. Congratulations to the 2020 GRADUATES all around the WORLD.

Friday, May 15, 2020

Is it time yet?

If you know it is time for a change then does it really matter what time it is? If times are changing then don't you think that you should make whatever changes are necessary to keep up with the times? You just can't get too comfortable in your life because life changes all the time. Obviously you may not like all the changes but you can't change it back to what you were used to. It is what it is and it ain't what it ain't. Just how much will change because of covid19 is yet to be determined. Things will definitely not get back to "normal" but whatever the "new normal" is, will determine how many changes we will all have to make. There has been some positive changes. The World has United to win the war against covid19. We don't see each other as the "enemy" but as fellow HUMANS who all have a common enemy. Another positive outcome is that HUMANITY is spreading in communities around the World. We will each have our personal journey as we begin to see what the future will look like for ourselves after the pandemic has passed. We will make whatever changes we need to and adapt our lives to our "new normal." It reminds me of the saying on my plaque, So this isn't home sweet home, adjust." Things will never be the same, it is what it is so do what you got to do, JUST DO IT.

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

Times are tough...

The pandemic has taken it's toll on every single person around the world. With all the unknowns, no one knows just how much worse it will get. Emotionally we all have been affected. But there are many people who the financial toll from the businesses being shutdown is hard to endure. The longer the quarantines go on the more people that will be devastated financially and emotionally. Just the other day when we entered phase one to reopen businesses, we excitedly headed to our favorite restaurant. The owner had worked at our local restaurant and had served us for over a decade before finally opening his own restraunt in the next town. When we got there instead of a sign that said closed for now due to covid19 like we had seen for the past two months, was a sign that said OUT OF BUSINESS. His hard work, his hope, his dreams and his livelyhood was GONE. The reality that all your hard work means nothing if you can't work, is another way that covid19 is a silent disease that is spreading. There is going to be a lot of people who need their community's support to recover from the affects of the pandemic. Whenever, wherever, however, to whomever you can please do what you can to help. If it was you I am sure you would hope that someone would help you. Be kind to everyone you meet because you have no idea what they may be facing.

Monday, May 11, 2020

You can't always choose but you will still have choices you will have to make

You may not have any choice on some of the situations you will face during your lifetime. But with every situation you will have choices on how you will react to them. It is not the situation you are dealing with that determines the outcome of the situation, it is how you react to them that will determine the outcome for you. Which will require you to STOP before you react to think about what your actions will bring. Once you react you can't take it back, your actions will decide how the situation will affect you. If you want a positive outcome you will have to make sure that you react in a way that a positive outcome is possible. You decide the outcome so make sure you do what you need to do to, so you can have the best outcome you possibly can under the circumstances of the situation you are forced to deal with. The harder the situation you have to face, the harder it will be to find how to react to minimize the damage it will have on you. It's not easy to figure out what to do. But the outcome will be harder on you if you don't figure it out before you react. What you look for will determine what you will find. Look for the best positive outcome so that you can have a positive outcome. Before you react, STOP and think about how you should react. You may not have had a choice in the situation but you do have the choice on how to react to it.

Friday, May 8, 2020

Before you hit send...

You decide to look something up in cyberspace and before you know it an hour has gone by. Have you ever tried to go back to find what you were reading on the internet but couldn't find it? You hit in the same thing you did the first time yet what you were looking at before is no where to be found. You could search for an hour and never find it. You know it is somewhere lost in cyberspace. Most of the time exploring cyberspace is a great distraction when you have plenty of time to be distracted. But when you need to get back to the information you were at in a timely manner, you don't have any time for distractions. Unfortunately even cyberspace has a Bermuda triangle that things disappear in. You never know what you will find in cyberspace and you will never know what will get lost in cyberspace. One thing is for sure if you don't want something you wrote to be found in the future then don't write it. Because once you hit send it is in permanent ink somewhere in cyberspace where some one could find it.

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

You don't get to redo the things you regret not doing

A "Bucket List" isn't intended to be a garbage can. Your "Bucket List" will change from when you are a child. As a child you believe that you can be anything you want to be and do everything you want to do. Your career choices will change many times before you grow up and finish school. As you choose which college to attend, you also start your "Bucket List." In case you haven't heard each thing you put on the list has to be accomplished by a certain age. If you save your "Bucket List" waiting to do it until you are retired, some of them you will have missed your opportunity to do. So before you toss it in your "Bucket" you should put them in time slots of which decade of your life they have to be done in. Obviously the more physical ones have to be done before you get too old and can't physically do them. You don't have to worry about your list of where you want to vacation because luckily those are places you can visit any decade of your life. Timing for other things you may add to your "Bucket List" will be necessary to do in a timely manner. A "Bucket List" should be almost empty by the time you are too old to remember what was on your list.

Monday, May 4, 2020

The bugs in your own back yard can be entertainment

While everything is closed you got to find ways to entertain yourself at home. As I was sitting outside I noticed a trail of ants. It is amazing how they all stay in a straight line. It reminded me of the movie Bugs Life. As I looked closer I could see that most of them were carrying things that were as big as they were. I sat outside for hours enjoying the gentle breeze and the fresh air. From time to time I would glance over at the trail of ants. I noticed one little ant off just an inch away from the line struggling to carry what looked like a piece of a leaf. It was twice his size and it's shape made it impossible for him to go in a straight line. Rather than hold the line up, he moved over. He was determined, no matter how hard it was, nothing would stop him from doing it. Once I noticed him I couldn't help but think about the determination, just like a human being has to have to struggle through Life with a heavy load to bare. I began to think about how many people are dealing with a lot of things due to the lockdowns. Just because the lockdowns will end doesn't end the struggles they will face to pick up the pieces of their lives and get back on track. If you can help them get up on their feet it will help them stand on their own, although they may still be a little wobbly. When the lockdowns are over be kind to everyone you meet because you have no idea what they may be going through, nor how wobbly they are.

Friday, May 1, 2020

You would have never experienced it

If we weren't experiencing a pandemic, we wouldn't have experienced the bonding moments with our families and friends. We stay in touch with each other in a way that would have never happened if it wasn't for covid19. Family time was nearly non-existent in most families. In the fast paced World we lived in, we barely even crossed paths. Now, only because everything is shutdown and we are all quarantined together in our homes, we have plenty of time and no where to go to enjoy each other's company. We all know how bonding it is for a family to sit down together every day to eat dinner. But it wasn't something that families everywhere were able to get everyone to do. The positive things on a human level that will come out of this pandemic will forever change each and every one of us. And family dinners may be part of the list of positive things that will come out of the pandemic. When I called to check on an old friend it wasn't about how hard being quarantined was. You could sense the smile on her face as she told me about the night that her and her family had played a game of scattegories. She chuckled as she described all the belly laughs they had. And a good belly laugh as you know is like a FLUSH that leaves you feeling refreshed from your head to your toes. She said she made her first lasagna and it was a meal that her and her family will definitely look forward to eating from now on, even after the quarantine has ended. She didn't list all the things she couldn't do while being quarantined, she listed all the exciting things that she was experiencing while she was quarantined. The difference between a good day and a bad day is all in how you look at it.

Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Have you ever been in the middle of a thought and someone interrupts your train of thought?

Have you ever been interrupted in the middle of a thought then afterwards you can't remember what that thought even was? You search your mind later but you can't remember. It is frustrating. It does however show you how when negative thoughts pop up front and center in your mind you can interrupt them and JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind. Our minds have an endless stream of thoughts running through it. One by one they take turns popping up front and center trying to grab our attention. If it is a negative thought, JUST FLUSH IT at a quick glance. If you give it a second thought you will have an avalanche of negative thoughts. It's like seeing a cockroach come out of your grocery bag. If you don't squish it, before you know it your house will be infested with cockroaches. Your thoughts make up the reality you live in. As the thoughts stream through your mind choose the ones that will have a positive affect on you. When you see a negative one it is as easy as changing the channel on your TV to something else. And if you see a cockroach coming out of your grocery bag, JUST SQUISH IT.

Monday, April 27, 2020

When the dust clears, what will you see?

In the end will you be proud of yourself for how you handled it? If you did the best you could, you should feel proud. Regardless how things turn out. If you did what you thought was the right thing to do, you should feel proud of yourself. Regardless how things turn out. All anyone can do is the best they can do. At the end of the day all that matters is if you are proud of yourself. That is not based solely on how things turned out. Even if things don't turn out like you had hoped, if you did the best you could, then you should be proud of yourself, regardless how things turned out. Being comfortable in the skin you are in is only possible if you are comfortable with what you do in the skin you are in.

Friday, April 24, 2020

It's hard to make a decision without all the facts


You can't say you made the right decision if you don't know all the facts to be able to have any chance of making the right decision. Unfortunately our governments will have to make many important decisions without knowing all the facts about covid19. I do believe every government in every country has a team of experts working together to make the best decision possible. They have to consider the Health risks but also the Economical risks. Nearly every country is working together and sharing data with other countries that is critical if any of us are to win the War against covid19. We know we can't keep everything closed for a year or so until they come up with a vaccine. Nor can we open everything up tomorrow. Important decisions will have to be made without having time to get all the facts. Follow the guidelines that are an attempt to protect us from it spreading and millions of people getting covid19. You do it for the same reason you get a flu shot. Because you want to protect yourself. You remind your family and your friends to get a flu shot so they don't get sick. One day at a time we will get through this and we will be one step closer to winning the War against covid19.



Wednesday, April 22, 2020

We all have things in COMMON even though we live in different parts of the WORLD

What used to work, won't work anymore. You can't get too comfortable in life because life is always changing. Even before the pandemic we all had to go through many changes throughout our lives. Since no one has ever experienced a pandemic before, we will all experience the changes at the same time. It doesn't matter whether you are Young or Old, nor what city or country you live in, we will all have to make changes. All the generations can work together for the first time to clean up the messes that have been made by generation after generation for decades. The HUMANITY that the covid19 has brought out all around the WORLD can replace the INSANITY in our societies. Let's make COMMON courtesy, COMMON decency, and COMMON sense, what we all have in COMMON. What grows in Florida may not grow everywhere but HUMANITY will grow EVERYWHERE it is planted. Remember you reap what you sow. It took a WORLDWIDE PANDEMIC to bring WORLD PEACE.

Monday, April 20, 2020

Find out if you can by trying

As new situations arise you have to get adventurous and creative. Obviously if it is something you have not done before you won't automatically know what to do. You won't know if you can do it unless you try to do it. As long as you try you can figure it out. You may not get it right the first time or do it like anyone else does but with a little creativity you can make it work for you. Things are different these days which means we will all have to learn to do things a little differently than we are used to. We have to entertain ourselves at home just like everyone did back in the "old days." At least nowadays we have our electronic gadgets and endless choices of television channels. Since time flys by before you know it things will open up again. Although we will have a new "normal" we will adjust to the changes and have some "normalcy"  in our lives soon. Meanwhile we have to follow the safety measures of social distancing to keep the spread of covid19 from getting out of control. By buying time for the scientist to figure out how to stop it from spreading and find a cure to keep people from dying who do get it. It is a sacrifice we all have to make to keep ourselves and our loved ones from dying during this pandemic. Distract yourself to stay busy so you don't have to much time on your hands to think about how bored you are or worry yourself sick over things that you can't do anything about. You can't forget we are living through a pandemic but you can be distracted for a little while as you focus on doing something to distract yourself. The busier you are the faster time will fly. We started watching full episodes of an old show one afternoon and before we knew it, it was getting dark outside. Look at it one day at a time instead of another month or two of lockdowns. We are one day closer to winning the war against covid19.

Friday, April 17, 2020

Social distancing is necessary but you can still be social

Although we must have social distancing that doesn't mean you can't still be social. It's hard to see if someone is smiling when they are wearing a mask, but you can still see it in their eyes. You can still say thank you while wearing a mask. As road construction is still going on, you can make someone smile by letting them have space to get over in the open lane. And pandemic or not don't forget to wave when someone let's you in the lane. I let three people in today in the mile drive and only one of them waved to say thank you. Surely they appreciated it but why didn't the other two drivers wave to show it? Times are tough but a little kindness goes a long way all the time, but especially nowadays. Be kind to everyone you see while you are keeping your distance. I have gotten more phone calls from family and friends in the past six weeks then I had in the past six years. It has been awesome to hear their voices instead of a quick text. A text doesn't give you the social bonding like a phone call does. I hope that even when things get back to "normal" that they call from time to time because that has been one change that I have enjoyed. I hope the humanity that this pandemic has brought to us all lasts forever. Some changes we have all had to make have made this world a better place. Even from a distance you can see the human compassion that is everywhere. Be kind to everyone you meet because you have no idea what they may be facing. A little bit of kindness goes a long way. A smile says peace in any language even if you only see it in their eyes.

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

What you learn will make you more informed

We are all learning how to adapt to the changes that the covid19 virus has brought. Although the changes are challenging, they are necessary. I don't believe that we will be able to return to "normal" even after the lockdowns are lifted. But I do believe that we all have learned a lot about self discipline that will make us a better version of ourselves, when all is said and done. Families have grown closer because we have had to spend more time at home with our families. Home cooked meals had become almost extinct for some families who now look forward to them. Gardening which had become a "lost art" is being done out of boredom right now will be reoccurring events for years to come for some people. Although a quarantine has it's drawbacks, it also has positive changes that we will carry with us for our lifetimes. The bonds with our friends and family is stronger because of the pandemic. The HUMANITY that it has brought will replace some of the INSANITY we have all had to live with in society. The lessens we have learned through this tragic pandemic has United every single person in the world, reminding us that we are all HUMAN. Seeing each other as humans not the enemy is what we needed to have WORLD PEACE. Sometimes it takes a negative situation to bring out the best in ourselves. Just like after a devastating fire the grass grows back greener and healthier than ever, after the pandemic is over, we will all see PEACE on Earth everywhere.

Monday, April 13, 2020

Keep a positive attitude

There is a lot of negative things going on but you can't only have negative thoughts about it. Otherwise it will have a negative affect on you even more than the negative situation by itself would have on you. There is always hope that things will get better soon. You can make some changes to adapt with everything going on to get through it. It doesn't change what you are going through but it will make it doable for you. Where there is a will there is a way. The future may be uncertain but you certainly can get through it. The changes you will have to make are not what you really want to do but they are what you will have to do. And to have a positive outcome when it is all over, you have to keep a positive attitude and a positive outlook so you can have a positive outcome. Remember to be thankful that you can manage to get by because it could always be much worse than it is. It ain't great but it is doable. With each passing day we are one step closer to winning the war against covid19.

Friday, April 10, 2020

It is not a waste of time if you had a good time doing it

You need to have a few moments that you do something just to relax and enjoy what you are doing. We all make the time to do the things that we have to do. But do you take any time out to do something that you do just because you enjoy doing it? Making the time to have a little fun every now and again is just as important as making the time to do the necessities that you need done. All work and no play can wear you down. You need a break every now and again to keep you from becoming exhausted and having a physical and mental breakdown. When your mind and body starts sending signals saying "Give me a break" it's warning you that you need a break. Heed the warning. We all have a built in warning signal. That feeling in the pit of your stomach is not always gas.

Wednesday, April 8, 2020

Change is necessary throughout your life, even more so then ever

We go through changes all throughout our lives. This time every single person in the whole wide world will have to make the same kind of changes at the same time. Since this pandemic is nothing any of us have had to experience, we need to unite to figure out how to combine our experiences and our knowledge to win the war against covid19. We have our differences but we are all HUMAN. We all want ourselves, our loved ones, our friends, and everyone in our community to live. I always say everything happens for a reason and all the suffering has made no rhyme or reason why this could be happening. But the truth is it has UNITED us against covid19. It has brought compassion in us all. Maybe this terrible pandemic was the ONLY WAY to bring WORLD PEACE so that we can work together to fight the war against covid19. TOGETHER WE can if UNITED we stand. It doesn't matter where you live, EVERY LIFE MATTERS.

Monday, April 6, 2020

We all definitely have time to get our Spring cleaning done

Usually you have to squeeze in the time to do your Spring cleaning while you juggle a busy exhausting schedule. This year you got plenty of time and the energy to do it. You will even have time to go through things that you had tucked away for a decade or two. By the end of the shutdowns you will have organized, inventoried, and cleaned every nook and cranny of your house. You will have gotten rid of the things you didn't need making more use of the storage you had. Each day as you do a little Spring cleaning you will begin to notice the difference a day can make and it will inspire you to look forward to what you can do each day. If you work on your "Hobby" for a few minutes each day it will give you something to look forward to doing each day. You can finally have time to work on the outside of your house or your yard. Just think of all the things you never had time to do at your house and make a LIST. We know we are on lockdown for at least a month. Can you imagine what you can do in that month if you did something each day? The more distractions you have to distract you right now is necessary to maintain your overall good physical health and mental health. There is a lot of uncertainties ahead of all of us. We need to be concerned but not be so obsessed about it that it affects our personal well being. Stress can lower your immune system, which is very important to fight off any flu or virus let alone the covid19 virus. Stress can raise your blood pressure which has a negative affect on many of our vital organs. We all have more time on our hands allowing too much time to think. And if you don't keep yourself busy to distract yourself the chances are greater that a negative thought will be able to "grab your attention." And once that happens you will have an avalanche of negative thoughts that soon consumes you. When a negative thought pops up front and center in your mind, JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind. Just look at it this way. A negative thought is like a cockroach. If you invite one cockroach in you know it won't be long before your house is full of cockroaches.     

Friday, April 3, 2020

It may not be preventable but it can be manageable

If you make it work for you, then things will work out okay for you. You may not be able to prevent it from happening but you can prevent it from happening a second time. Just because you are faced with a negative situation, you still can have a positive outcome. It will be how you react to the negative situation that will determine the outcome. Whenever something negative happens just stop before you react. Think about what your actions will bring to decide how you should react. Your first thought when enduring a negative situation is always going to be negative. And if act on it you will make the situation permanently worse. So before you say anything or do anything, STOP. Take some time to think about how to react to have the best outcome possible for you. And yelling or threatening won't give you any chance to have a positive outcome. Two wrongs don't make a right but by doing the right thing you can't go wrong. Remember once you say it or do it the damage is done. Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all. Sometimes the best thing to do is to just walk away and JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind because anything you say or do will only make it worse.

Wednesday, April 1, 2020

Time to get a hobby

Now is the perfect time to get a hobby. Not only will a hobby make you happy, it will make those around you happy, as it distracts you from the stress of being quarantined. You can become easily agitated with everything that is going on right now. Especially if you are someone who has temporarily been unable to work because of the shutdowns. I certainly hope you find the financial help you need to survive until businesses can open back up. The fear of you or someone you love dying from the covid19 virus weighs heavy on everyone's mind. It's a good time to start a new hobby or indulge your mind with an old hobby that you hadn't done in ages. Someone I know started making bird houses to give to friends and family at Christmas time. His wife is going to be a part of the decorating part of it, which has certainly kept their spirits up. And just think of all the money they will save not having to buy anyone Christmas gifts. And what pride they will feel as the recipients open them up and express how creative they are. Another person I know hadn't knitted in years, but boy won't her friends and family be surprised to see what they are going to get for Christmas. To relieve your stress you got to get busy thinking about things that relax you to distract you. It's hard to not think about what is going on all over the world. But if you want to be alright when it is finally over, you got to distract yourself to stay healthy enough while it is happening, to be still standing when it's over.

Monday, March 30, 2020

While we are all staying home, we finally get to spend quality time with our family

Long before internet you had to entertain yourselves in other ways. Now is a good time to build a puzzle. We had two puzzles burrired in our closet along with other Christmas gifts we had been given over the decades. You just might be surprised what you actually have kept that you have stuffed in your closet. Now is the time to go through old stuff to help entertain you while we are stuck indoors to stay safe from covid19. The puzzles we found weren't just regular puzzles they were very unique. One was a round puzzle with pictures on both sides making you have to essentially solve two puzzles at the same time. The other one had extra pieces to throw you off for as long as they could. When you get a puzzle started that will take days to do, at some point other family members will sit down occasionally to find a piece or two. Eating home cooked meals together as we are staying home has definitely had a positive impact on families everywhere. Sitting down eating together every night, bonds a family and that was missing in families everywhere. The fast paced electronic driven society we live in, had made family dinner time non existent. We have to focus on the positive things that are happening so we don't let all the negative things that are happening be the only thing we think about. Stress lowers your immune system which is not going to allow you to fight off any sickness let alone covid19. Make a list of the bonding little moments you have with your family each day while you are quarantined. Keep your list handy so you can add them as they occur. When you are feeling frustrated at what is happening from time to time, just read the list you have written and you will have plenty to be thankful for that wouldn't have happened if you were not quarantined together as a family.

Friday, March 27, 2020

The difference between a good day and a bad day may be how you look at it

It may not be a day where everything goes how you had planned but that doesn't mean it wasn't a good day. Sure things could have gone better but that doesn't mean it was a bad day. Even when you have had a really bad day, if you look at everything that happened that day you will find there was something good that happened that day. Even if it is just the simple fact that you are alive makes it a good day. I know as I go through the grocery store and there are still things that are not in stock, I am still happy that I got other stuff I needed. How you look at it will determine what you see. If you look for only the negative things in a situation, then you will find them. If you look hard enough to find something positive about the situation, then you will find something positive about it. It is all in how you look at it. Remember the situation you are in may be bad, but that doesn't mean the outcome for you is going to be bad. How you look at it and react to it will determine the outcome of the situation you are in. If you want a good outcome then look for a way that a positive outcome would be possible. Enjoying life while you are living it despite all the negative things that will happen along your journey, is the only way to enjoy life while you are living it.

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

A little bit of kindness can do a whole lot of good

Having at least what you need may be difficult for some people. Social distancing is necessary to fight the covid19 virus but you have to go out to the store to get the necessities you need, if you have any chance to get the basics that you need. I haven't been able to get certain things for over a week now, hand sanitizer especially. When you need gas you have to stop to fill up your tank. As I push on the buttons to make my card work to purchase gas, I wander if it is contaminated with the covid19 virus. As I hold on to the gas nozzle as I fill up my tank, I wander if it is contaminated. Everywhere you go you have to wander if you will be contaminated. I know we all face the fear of being contaminated. But stress from worrying can actually lower your immune system, which is not healthy. You can't forget about it, you can't let your guard down, so remember.... it's okay to be concerned about it but don't be obsessed about it. If you find hand sanitizer by chance in a store, please don't buy all of it so no one else can get some. We all need toilet paper so don't buy it all. Stores are starting to put limits on how many you can purchase but as we saw in a recent video one customer at a store with no limit filled her truck with every toilet paper and paper towels that the store had. Just because they didn't have a sign what happened to common decency, common courtesy and common sense? Really would be nice if we all come together and use common sense. You aren't protected if you are the only one with hand sanitizer. If we all had some we wouldn't be spreading germs. Life could get back to normal if together we fight the covid19 virus, if we don't work together the World as we know it will be devastated. You may survive the covid19 virus but will you be able to survive the challenges you would face? No matter what city or country you live in, we all have a common enemy, the covid19 virus. We all need to use common decency, common courtesy, and common sense to fight the war against covid19. Since for the first time every person in the whole wide world is United, we can see each other as humans as it will take every single person around the World if any of us are to win the war against covid19.  World Peace is possible.

Monday, March 23, 2020

Everyone must do their part

We can't be divided if we want to win the war against the covid19 virus. It doesn't matter if you are Young or Old, everyone has to do their part. It doesn't matter if you are Male or Female, everyone has to do their part. It doesn't matter what race you are, we all must do our part. It doesn't matter what City or Country you are from, we all must do our part. It doesn't matter if you are Rich or Poor, we all must do our part. Although if you are Rich you could sure use some of that extra cash to save some businesses that may not financially recover from their economic situation. Or you could consider buying a few medical supplies that would literally save people's lives. Everyone in the Whole Wide World can win the war against the covid19 virus if we work together. I sure have seen a lot of HUMANITY going on all over the WORLD and that may be one of the positive things that has come from this pandemic. This terrible situation that everyone in the WORLD is dealing with won't get better on it's own, we all must do our part. Let's work together to win the war against the covid19 virus.

Friday, March 20, 2020

Now is the time to look up Old recipes

As bread has been hard to find it's time to look up how to make your own fresh bread. The items that you will need are still fully stocked up on the store shelves. You have to get creative these days. It will bring a smile to your face and warm your families bellies and hearts as they are thankful for the delicious bread you made them. There are still plenty of stock of fresh produce in most stores and we all know fruits and vegetables are a part of maintaining good health. Staying home eating home cooked meals has been missing in families the last decade or so. This World wide pandemic is devastating and we know it will get worse but in the end it will cause every single person around the World to connect with each other on a human level. Together every person no matter what city or country you live in has to fight this war against the corona19 virus, United we stand, although quarantined, together to fight it.

Wednesday, March 18, 2020

It is okay to be concerned but not healthy to be obsessed

You can't say the word "pandemic" without a feeling of panic. We all need to be concerned and follow the instructions of our health department. When you see images of our beaches being crowded, you know that there are lots of people not following the rules that are necessary to minimize the massive spread of the covid19 virus. Businesses that are forced to shut down, are concerned about the economic struggles they will face. So why are people defeating the purpose of the closures? If twenty percent of the population are going around spreading the virus then the effort eighty percent who did close was for nothing. We need to close our free beaches just like we closed businesses even though we know how bad economically it will hurt them. We need to enforce the rules that were set to protect all of us. Now with that being said. We all should be concerned about it but it is not healthy for us to be obsessed about it. We all must work together to stop the spread of the corona19 virus. Together as one nation we can reduce the suffering and deaths from it. It takes ALL of us not eighty percent of us, to fight the war against the covid19 virus. Learn to have fun at home and stay home. We started playing card games and board games that we hadn't played in years. We even broke out the home movies to distract us from constantly obsessing over what unknowns lie ahead for any of us. Please stay safe and follow the instructions of our health departments.

Monday, March 16, 2020

Take the time to stop and "smell the roses"

Well the clocks have spring forward and spring is in the air. Hopefully you have some annual flowers planted in your yard that will soon be blooming. Time to wash down the patio furniture to sit in while the weather is still cool not blistering hot. You can enjoy the nature and the breeze in the daylight and relax later as you enjoy the stars in the sky at night. We enjoyed a game of rummy the other night, which we hadn't played in years. Make the most of your time at home by enjoying the time you have to relax. We went through old photo albums from decades ago, we had a blast reminiscing about so many things. We had forgotten moments that came flooding back with each picture. Suddenly we could vividly see the day in our minds that were buried deep in our memories. In the old days we took lots of pictures which we filled in photo albums. Now they are there to enjoy the memories they evoke. Nowadays photo albums are non existent to the last generation or two. They will have no way to trigger those special memories that are buried deep in their minds. You need to take pictures because you need help to remember all the good times for decades and they won't pop up unless they get triggered. The same is true for "small talk" that brings up subjects that you don't always have time for. You miss a lot of "little things" if you are always in too big of a hurry to slow down to enjoy them.

Friday, March 13, 2020

Can anything positive come out of the corona19 virus?

So many times I have started to write a blog about the corona19 virus, but they sounded so negative. I write short little blogs to give you something to ponder to distract you long enough to catch a fresh breath of air. In this fast paced World we live in, we don't slow down to relax. At times our lives can be filled with chaos and a relaxing moment to forget about it, is important. I have tried to think of something positive that could possibly come out of the corona19 virus, finally I started seeing some. As we are forced basically to stay home as much as possible, we can finally have time for "small talk" that has become non existent in the fast paced World we live in. We have time and we want to call relatives and friends to check up on them, which keeps us connected to our "human side" that is desperately needed in society. Since we aren't running around we won't be eating unhealthy fast food, so we will save money and get healthier. Not to mention we will lose a few pounds eating healthy foods at home, and loosing a few pounds is a good thing. Because we aren't going out for entertainment, we will save money. Since we aren't out shopping, we will save money. Giving our bodies a much needed break from running it ragged, is definitely good for your health. All those projects you had put off because you weren't home long enough to do them, well now you have the time and the energy to do them. No matter what country or what city you live in, the corona19 virus will have a negative impact on each and every one of us. It is natural to be concerned but don't be obsessed about it, that alone is dangerous to your health. What will you do with the extra time you have?

Wednesday, March 11, 2020

It's your choice, so choose wisely

You choose whether to be honest or not just like you choose what to eat for dinner. You choose whether you will do the right thing or not, just like you choose what to wear each day. You can't say you had no choice because you do have a choice. Just because other people are doing it doesn't make it right. The choices you make matters so choose wisely. If you choose to ignore bad behavior then it will become a common occurrence and it's only a matter of time before it happens to you or someone you love. Choosing to do nothing is still a choice you make. The choice is yours, so choose wisely. The choices you make today affect the choices you will be able to make later.

Monday, March 9, 2020

There are no guarantees

You can hope for the best, but you have to also be prepared for the worst. You can make plans but things don't always turn out as you had planned. Having a back up plan is necessary because there may not be anyone to back you up if you need it. It's sad but true that you can only count on yourself. You can be surrounded by people that are only around for the good times, but during bad times they are no where around if you need them. A fair weather friend will blow away the minute the stormy times come. Be honest with yourself and make sure you have what you need or be caught off guard and find that you weren't prepared for what might hit you. Friends are nice to have but remember they may just be a fair weather friend and you will experience rain from time to time.

Friday, March 6, 2020

If you want to make the most out of a bad situation you have to...

Let's face it, life is full of challenges. No matter how well you walk a thin line to avoid it, things happen in life, that's just Life. The "Rollercoaster of Life" is full of ups and downs and twists and turns. Along with the challenges you will have to face, there are also opportunities. You can't get too comfortable in life because life is always changing. You may not want anything to change but things are always changing. You have to keep up with the changes or you will not be able to navigate through the challenges you will be faced with. One change I will never get used to is calling a business and get a computer voice. How many times have you screamed "Need a Human" into the phone? It is so frustrating to call to take care of a small problem but talking to a HUMAN isn't one of the options you are given to choose from. I often wander if those companies realized that by the time you reach a HUMAN, you are so angry that your problem with them feels bigger. Unfortunately some businesses have that type of answering service and no matter how stressful it is you have to succeed in getting past the computer voice part of it, to be able to talk to a HUMAN. Now that I wish they would change.

Wednesday, March 4, 2020

I know they know better

It amazes me what people will do even though they know better. Even if it hurts someone, they do it anyways. Unfortunately some people never get bit on the butt by karma. So since they pay no consequences they repeatedly do it. Why is it that some people are affected by karma and some are not? If you wouldn't want someone to do it to you or someone you love, you shouldn't do it. If affects anyone else in a negative way, you shouldn't do it. Don't accept bad behavior because if you ignore it then it will become a common occurrence. What happened to common decency, common courtesy and common sense?

Monday, March 2, 2020

Does it really matter?

Stressing over things that don't really matter only makes the important things you have to do more stressful. As a friend and I who rarely got together, were heading out to enjoy ourselves, the traffic made it a frustrating ride. It seemed to have zapped the energy right out of both us. But obviously the extra five minutes in traffic didn't affect our plans at all. But as we began to talk about the traffic it was interfering with the conversations we would have had as we drove here and as we walked through the parking lot. Once inside we both realized that we had to JUST FLUSH IT out of our minds so we could enjoy our day out together. You can't enjoy the moment you are in if you spend every moment thinking about things that happened yesterday. Yesterday is already gone, tomorrow may never come, but today is yours to enjoy. To enjoy life you have to enjoy it while you are living it.

Friday, February 28, 2020

Getting angry about it hurts you so JUST FLUSH IT

Sure it will anger you but the damages you cause yourself from being angry, is something you can prevent. You may not have been able to prevent the situation you are in but you can prevent yourself from making the situation worse then it is. Anything and everything you do or say will determine the outcome. If you react negatively then you will have a negative outcome, because two wrongs don't make a right. You need to delay your reaction until you have had time to think about what your actions will bring. You will realize that you need to accept it, what's done is done and JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind to prevent anymore damage. You may have had no choice whether it happened or not but it is your choice whether you let it hurt you over and over again or not. JUST FLUSH IT so it can't hurt you anymore.

Wednesday, February 26, 2020

You are who you think you are

You can be your own worst enemy. You are who you think you are so don't worry about what other people think about you, the only thing that matters is what you think about yourself. You may not get a compliment or a pat on the back from others, so give yourself a pat on the back. You may not be the best at everything but as long as you do the best you can, then you should be proud of yourself. To feel comfortable in the skin you are in you have to be comfortable with what you do in the skin you are in. It doesn't matter what other people do, you have to do what makes you happy. It doesn't matter what anyone else tells you that you should do. You do what you need to do because you are the only one that has to live with the consequences for everything you do. No one is perfect so don't judge yourself so harshly because you are not perfect. If you tell yourself that you can't do it then you won't do it because you will never try to do it. You can either be your biggest cheerleader or your worst enemy. Which one you choose is up to you.

Monday, February 24, 2020

What will change because of it?

You can learn from your mistakes and make the necessary changes, but that is only if you admit that you made a mistake. You can learn from other people's mistakes rather than having to make the same mistakes, but that is only possible if you take the time to notice.  By the time you get old you have learned a lot of mistakes that you can avoid repeating. You want to warn those younger than you by telling them what you have learned to keep them from making the same mistakes. Unfortunately they don't want to listen. It's hard to watch them make a mistake that you tried to prevent. I know they don't want to hear I TOLD YOU SO. I have learned to simply say, I am sorry I was afraid that could happen. Sometimes I wander what is the point of all the knowledge you accumulated over your lifetime if no one will listen to benefit from it? In these fast paced times we live in, no one makes the time for "small talk" which is when random stories and details emerge that you can learn from. Through many decades of "small talk" I am able to recall and share past experiences that could help someone. But unfortunately they were so busy running around like a chicken with their head cut off that I never got to warn them. Not everything you need to know in life can be found on Google.

Friday, February 21, 2020

Surely you can see the pain it causes

A heartbroken mother of a nine year old boy from Australia shared a video showing the affects bullying had on her son. There is no way anyone can watch that video without tearing up and getting angry as hell. To hear and see the emotional torment he was going through was heart wrenching. Schools should be a place where our children are safe. Unfortunately schools everywhere have "shooter drills" which definitely doesn't make parents or children feel safe knowing they have to be prepared because it could happen. But SCHOOL BULLYING destroys lives on a daily basis but no one protects our children from being bullied. I have seen bully's in school children start from kindergarten age and are allowed to continue being a bully all the way through their school years. If they would have stopped them in kindergarten from doing it, they wouldn't have been able to do it to hundreds of other children. I think schools need to be held accountable for allowing it to continue. Of course the parents play a big role in teaching their child to be kind to others. But by law you have to send your child to school or face the consequences. Why isn't there a law that our children be safe from being bullied or the school will pay the consequences. In the video the boy cries out while pointing and said and "you didn't do anything." That few seconds of video is for ALL of us to hear, he is talking to ALL of us. We know it is happening and we need to do something about it.

Wednesday, February 19, 2020

You may have heard it but that doesn't mean you heard anything

If you don't listen, you won't hear it and neither will they. It may seem like a little thing but when you see the "Big Picture" you can see just how big it really is. Sometimes if you just listen to them describing the "Big Picture" they can see it for the first time themselves. By someone just giving them a chance to try to explain their complex situation, it allows them to see for themselves the "Big Picture." When they see it they will be able to know exactly what they need to do. A therapist you pay to listen. They know that by letting you talk about it, you will be able to figure things out on your own. Unfortunately those around you that you would be able to talk with to help, seem to always be to busy to listen long enough for you to be able to see the "Big Picture." It is certainly not something you could do in a text or an email. With all the technology these days, we rarely take the time to relate to each other on a human level. We can become so distracted that we don't notice what others are truly going through. Without staying in touch with your human side you become lost in cyberspace. You don't have to solve it for them just take the time to let them see the "Big Picture", so they can see how to solve it themselves.

Monday, February 17, 2020

Without an imagination you won't be able to imagine the possibilities

Being creative will help you create the best outcome for yourself. You can't always see it right away, but with a little imagination and creativity you can make lemonade out of lemons. If you can imagine it, then you know it is possible. Without an imagination you won't be able to imagine what is actually possible. Could you imagine what is possible if you got creative? To make the best out of a bad situation you have to remember that it is all in how you look at the situation. The outcome is not determined by the situation you are in but on how you react to the situation you are in. With a little imagination and creativity you can have a positive outcome. If you can't imagine it then it won't be possible because you won't see the possibilities. You will find what you are looking for but only if you look for it will you be able to find it.


Friday, February 14, 2020

Don't waste it, make the most out of it

It's income tax time again. In the creative writing class I took many years ago, we were given the assignment to make up a new word and it's meaning. Because it was income tax time, my word was "scervous." It's meaning was being scared and nervous about how much I would owe. Now if you are lucky enough to get a refund, then for you, income tax time would be exciting and something you looked forward to. For some people who live payday to payday, it's the only time they get a chance to have any cash that you don't owe out before you get it. Don't waste it, use it wisely. It's tempting to go shopping and just blow it. Make the most of it by spending it wisely. You might enjoy some new clothes or a new electronic gadget, but if you have been worried about needing tires for your car, then you should use the money on new tires. Going to all of your favorite restraunts that you can't afford while you are living paycheck to paycheck, sounds good. But it is better to plan on one special dinner out, then use the rest of the money to fill your pantry and stock up on household supplies. That way you will have a little extra money as you live paycheck to paycheck for weeks, not use the money on a meal that only satisfies you for a few hours before it's time for your next meal. Instant gratification only lasts for an instant. It is best to choose what you want to spend your money on then the moment you get your refund check, stick to your decision and do it right away. Because if you hold on to it waiting to decide, it will get wasted little by little until it is gone. You should definitely splurge on something for yourself but don't make a gluten out of yourself.

Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Hang on tight and you will be alright

There are millions of people but your circle of life is made up of only a handful of people. And you have to hold on tight to keep the circle together. When the circle is broken from a death, you have to grab your "Duct Tape" to keep the circle together. Unfortunately, as well as births there will be deaths, they are both a part of the circle of life. I have seen a death in families that causes the family circle to be broken forever. I have seen family reunions that everyone had gathered at for decades, stop when just one person died out of one family, out of the group of families that had always gone to the family reunions. That should have made everyone else look forward to the next family reunion that much more because you never know if you will see them again. If your family doesn't have family reunions, I suggest you start that tradition.

Monday, February 10, 2020

You can peacefully agree to disagree

Just because your opinion is different than their opinion, doesn't mean you should get angry or violent towards them. You may not agree with them but they have a right to have their own opinion. If you want the right to have your opinion you will have to respect other people's opinions. You can agree to disagree. Unfortunately some people get angry if you voice your opinion if it is different from theirs. Especially politics and religion. Some of my dearest friends and family members have a different opinions on politics and religion. Therefore, we don't talk about them with each other. There are times when the subjects get brought up and immediately the tone of the conversation gets tense. When it happens one of us says let's change the subject. We know that nothing we say to each other will change the other ones opinion but we know trying to would only damage our relationship. There is plenty to talk to each other about that has nothing to do with politics or religion. For the sake of our friendship, we just agree to disagree. If you find yourself starting to get tense when someone tells you their opinion, stop, exhale, and bring up a different subject to talk about. To keep peace you both just agree to disagree. It's that simple. Because it could take one simple argument over something you both know you have totally opposite opinions about to end a relationship that is not nor never has been what your friendship was formed on. You are who you are and they are who they are, and that is why you agree to disagree.

Friday, February 7, 2020

A helping hand VS a hand out

It feels good to lend a helping hand to someone. Sometimes that is all they need to stand on their own again. Getting just a little behind when you are barely making it can be all it takes to knock you down. Even just needing a part for your car that you can't afford can be devastating because you need your car to get to work. It can be a stressful situation that you couldn't avoid. If you could would you give them a helping hand and buy the part they need? The only thing is do they really need a helping hand or are they playing on your emotions to get a free hand out? If you don't know them well enough to know then it's hard to reach out and help them. I have met several people who always say they desperately need help yet they really just want to emotionally play with your kind-heartedness to get anything for free. We were about to give someone an old car we had after hearing them repeatedly say how desperately they needed one. Then we found out that someone else had already given them a car. How on Earth could they say they needed a car then? When we confronted them about knowing they already had one, they just chuckled. They showed no guilt. They felt no shame, they just chuckled. Needless to say we didn't give them the car. Unfortunately it has affected us in a negative way. Our kind-heartedness has grown a little colder. We learned we can't just act on our emotions because we realized we can be fooled. You know the saying fool me once shame on them, getting fooled twice shame on you, it just makes us the fools. You have to know if someone just needs a helping hand or are just looking for hand-outs. Those that don't ask for your help yet you see they are struggling, those are the only ones that you should give a helping hand to. Because unfortunately some people get whatever they can simply because they get away with it. I have seen news stories about pan handlers that admit they make more tax free money begging then they made working. I have seen them walk from the street corner where they stood with their sign, over to the parking lot across the street and get into a nice car and drive away. After that I only give to the firemen who collect twice a year at our intersection of town and the Bell ringers in front of the stores at Christmas time. And of course the monthly gift we give to St. Jude's for decades now that we know use every penny they get on treatments and research in hopes of finding a cute for cancer. So before you reach out a helping hand make sure your help is needed. Because giving someone a handout just makes them continue taking advantage of people's kind-heartedness. Be kind but don't be foolish.


Wednesday, February 5, 2020

There will be set backs but...

Accepting that there will be setbacks at times in your life, will help you not let them hold you back. If you think everything will always be smooth sailing for you during your life's journey, you won't be prepared when you hit rough times. Knowing that there will be tough times, can help you get through the tough times. You got to be able to JUST FLUSH IT so you can move on. Remind yourself of the things that you are good at and use those "tools" to get you back on track. The outcome is not what happens in life as much as it is about how you react to what happens to you. So if something angers you don't react until you have time to think about what your reactions would bring. Your first thought to a negative situation is so negative that the outcome will be negative. You will still be angry about it, but as long as you stop and think about it, you won't be angry at yourself for making things worse by how you reacted. Relying on your strengths will be the key to turning the situation around to get a positive outcome.



Monday, February 3, 2020

Did you notice that?

Even in a crowded area it is possible that no one noticed. We have trained ourselves to ignore everything. Some call it minding your own business. Some say they were too busy to notice. Others say it is too dangerous to get involved. And sadly enough, some say it's because they don't care what is happening to anyone else. When I was growing up, the neighbors would watch out for each other. And you feared that they would tell your parents if you misbehaved, nowadays neighbors fear retaliation if they tell on kids. When I told my neighbors son to go tell his parents what I just saw him doing, his response was his parents didn't care. I had known his parents and their children for a long time and I asked him out of respect for me please go tell your parents. He said yes mam. In less than a minute he was back outside. He said I told them what you said and just like I thought they said they didn't care. I thanked him for at least showing me respect and going in to tell them. Years later when he was grown up, when we were talking he brought up the memory of that day. He said he had always respected me for that. I was so happy that he remembered everything about that afternoon that was so long ago. He said he realized then that I was an old fashioned parent. I had never forgotten the incident but I assumed just like his parents that he would have forgotten it. Your brief encounter can make an impression, even though you don't think so. Perhaps as a parent one day he will care to hear from his neighbors if his children are misbehaving. Then he could nip it in the bud before it leads to commonly misbehaving when they are older..it's much easier to stop a three year old from unacceptable behavior. If you wait until they are teenagers and out of control, it will be too late. Teach them from an early age. My best advice to young parents is to remember they have to love their children enough to let them hate them when they have to call them out on their bad behavior.

Friday, January 31, 2020

Was it taught or untaught?

Everyone is born with honesty and a conscience. A young child says whatever pops in their mind. They sometimes let your secrets out because they had no idea that it was something that was a secret.  Most of the time it isn't a big deal if anyone else knows, but you would have rather that no one else knew. When I was young the  family would all gather to watch the old show called " Kids say the darndest things." It wasn't very funny necessarily for kids but it sure made the adults laugh uncontrollably. Now that I am "old" I see the show from a whole different point of view. And I laugh uncontrollably and say OMG a lot. If you are a parent to young children it makes you wander what might fly out of their mouths at any given time. I know when my children were young they blurted out things that not only did I wish they hadn't, but I didn't even know they had heard or seen. Children of all ages appear to be too busy to notice yet somehow they can describe to a tee, everything that was going on all around them.  Unfortunately the pictures they describe are full of some details that you would rather that no one else knew. Knowing that children are born with a conscience to guide them, you have to wander how is it possible that they can be so cruel to each other. Just how did they suddenly become a school bully. How can they be allowed to bully other children? You by law have to send your kids to school yet there doesn't seem to be a law that the teachers can't ignore it when they see someone being bullied. If you ignore it then it becomes acceptable behavior. And if you accept it then it will be a common occurrence. That means your teaching our children that it is okay to be a bully and it's okay that they are the victim of the bullying. It's time we start focusing on just what's going on in our schools these days. We need to remember every home is a class room and every parent is a teacher. What we teach our kids are learned behaviors. It takes a village to raise a child because every single interaction they have determines who they become as adults that make up our neighborhoods. We all can teach the children so that they can help clean up the mess in society that took many generations to create. If all the generations can come together we can fix it in "OUR" generation. Teach HUMANITY to replace the INSANITY we see in society these days. World peace is possible but it will happen one person at a time having "peace of mind."

Wednesday, January 29, 2020

Wanting the opposite

People with straight hair want curly hair. People with natural curly hair want straight hair. My son has curly hair and I bought him the new hair straighting brush off Amazon. It really worked. Within a few minutes his hair was straight. But he was unrecognizable to me and everyone else. Luckily he felt strange and decided he was more comfortable with his natural curly hair. You may think you want something else but then you realize you are  comfortable with what you got. People think the grass is greener on the other side but when they look closer they can see the sand Spurs all throughout that green lawn. Then they are thankful that even though their lawn isn't as green, they can  comfortably walk without shoes. Looks can be deceiving. If you are comfortable, then enjoy what you got. You may not have everything you ever wanted but you have everything that you need to be comfortable. You may not miss it until it is gone but when it's gone, you may not be able to get it back. If it works then don't throw it away.

Monday, January 27, 2020

If only for a moment

A moment can happen in the blink of an eye. Yet every moment has a chance to change things in an instant. An opportunity may come come knocking at your door, but if you don't open the door and grab the opportunity, you wasted any opportunity you may have had. You may only have a handful of big moments throughout your lifetime. But there are an endless amount of "little special moments" you have a chance to enjoy. Every moment has a chance to be a memory you can cherrish forever. Only thing is, you have to slow down to have a moment you can enjoy. One less you tube video, one less email, one less game on our devices, one less moment of reading our social media, will give.us the time we need to spend with the humans around us, so we can have memories we can cherrish. The cyberspace technology has made human connection a rare occurrence. It is a shame when the closest thing to a hug most people get is a poke, a text, or an email.

Friday, January 24, 2020

If you could see it from the outside...

Someone looking at it from the outside, may not necessarily see what you can from the inside. Obviously only you know everything about what you are dealing with, it's your life. You are affected not only by what they see but by everything you have had to live throughout your entire lifetime. With that being said, listening to what they see looking at it from the outside, can't hurt and who knows it may be helpful to you. Since you alone have to live with the consequences of your decisions then of course you alone should make those decisions. But in order to be sure you are making the right decision, you need to look at the situation from every view possible before you make a decision. What they see may not affect your decision at all. But just in case they see something you couldn't, it might just be important to know before you make a decision. Keep an open mind as you listen, just in case you hear something important.

Thursday, January 23, 2020

Ooops, I did it again

I can't believe I missed posting a blog post yesterday. In ten years I had only missed my regularly Monday, Wednesday and Friday blogging schedule three or four times. Now in less than thirty days, I have missed three blog days. For those of you who have stopped by to read them on those days, I apologise. I was dealing with a cold that kept returning. I would take cold medicine then think I was just going to lay down for a nap. Unfortunately some naps lead to not waking up until early the next morning. The flu season is here. Don't forget to get your flu shot. I was reminded to get mine after being sick the first week of this thirty day period, a little too late. Hopefully now after two more weeks, the flu shot can effectively protect me from catching the flu again.

Monday, January 20, 2020

Keep it simple if you can

Sometimes you can be so overwhelmed that you are exhausted before you get started. You need to look at whatever it is as a job that needs to be done one step at a time. Split up the task into three steps so you don't feel so overwhelmed. Being able to see it as simply doing step one, then step two and then you simply move on to step three, allows you to believe that it is as easy as one, two, three. The more simple you keep things the more simplified the task will be to do. When you believe that it is too difficult for you to do, the less likely you are to do it. Remember Rome wasn't built in a day, but it got built. Not everything you need to do can be done in one step. But as long as you keep doing each step, you will get it done. Don't let your thoughts wear you out before you even get started.

Friday, January 17, 2020

It may seem like a small thing but it can make a big difference

Have you ever had a nagging feeling like you were forgetting something really important? You start going over everything you know you need as you run around getting them done. But still you have a feeling there is something you are forgetting. You keep thinking realizing other things that were not on the top of your list of things to do, so you go ahead and get them done too. You spend the day getting your list done plus the extra stuff you thought of, by now it is late and you are exhausted. Just as you get settled in, you remember what you needed to do that was so important. Unfortunately the business you were supposed to go to is now closed. The worst part is I had meant to do it earlier in the week but I kept forgetting all about it each day. Now it is Friday and Monday is a holiday so I can't do it now until Tuesday. It was a small errand so not a big deal but forgetting it three days in a row made it a big deal on many personal levels. I just had my son text me a message so Tuesday if I forget, I can read my text. I even set an alarm for two different times on Tuesday to remind me. Now I got to get over my disappointment in forgetting and JUST FLUSH IT out of my mind so I can enjoy the three day weekend being satisfied with all the other things I did get done.

Wednesday, January 15, 2020

It will make your journey harder if you carry the past along on your journey

Look at your negative experiences from your past as sandbags. Could you imagine choosing to carry sandbags? If you can't learn what you need to from it and then JUST FLUSH IT out of your mind, then you are choosing to carry that sandbag. Your life's journey will be hard enough without carrying heavy sandbags on your journey. Obviously if it is weighing heavy on your mind you have to JUST FLUSH it out of your mind to lighten your load. If you don't then you are choosing to carry that sandbag with you. Accepting what someone else did or accepting something you yourself did, is the first step to healing from it. Forgiveness is something you do for yourself. You will never forget but accepting things you can not change will help you move on. And leaving those sandbags in your past will make your life's journey easier to enjoy. You can't always chose what happened in your past but you do get to choose how many sandbags you want to carry.

Monday, January 13, 2020

What it means to you doesn't mean it is what they meant it to mean to you

Sometimes we take what someone says or does to mean something that isn't what it meant at all. If you can communicate how you felt by it they can explain what they meant by it. Unfortunately you can be so angered by what you thought they said that you don't bother to know the true meaning of what they said. If you always expect them to say something negative to you then all you listen for is a negative twist to whatever they say. If negative is what you look for then that is what you are looking for and that is all you will find. There are many ways to look at things and depending on how you look at it will determine what you see and hear. In any relationship you need to communicate to have a good relationship. You won't always see eye to eye but listening to each other is necessary to meet in the middle. We can see things differently yet still through understanding how each other feels about what they saw, resolve our differences. Always being in defense mode can make you always feel like you have to defend yourself, even when you don't. It is impossible to communicate with someone who is always in a defense mode just waiting to attack you in defense of themselves. Relax and enjoy the conversation for what it is. You need to guard yourself at all times without being ready to attack at all times. They say words can't hurt you but that is not true. It is also true that someone's words that hurt you was not words they actually said but that you implying that is what their words meant. Give them a chance to defend what you heard before you attack them for words they didn't really mean when they said them to you.

Wednesday, January 8, 2020

What you pass on will spread, but what are you passing on?

It's true, you reap what you sow. But it is also true that what you sow can effect others in society. When you plant a garden you don't want to plant weeds at the same time. Because if you did, the weeds would spread and prevent your vegetables from growing.  The same is true in life situations. If you want a positive outcome then don't go into it with a negative attitude. You will reap what you sow. A negative situation may be challenging but with the right attitude it can have a positive outcome. It's all in how you look at it. Anyone can make a mountain out of a mole hill if they keep adding dirt. You can easily go around or over a mole hill. But you may not be able to climb a mountain. When life drops a boulder in your path, just go around it. Don't just stand there and waste time and energy on trying to remove it, just go around it. On your life's journey if you reach a dead end, just turn around and go back and choose a different direction. The roller coaster called Life is full of ups and downs as well as twists and turns, that's just Life. And sometimes in life you got to look hard to find a positive response to a negative situation so that you can have a chance for a positive outcome. It is not what happens to you that determines the outcome, but it is how you react to what happens to you that will determine the outcome.

Monday, January 6, 2020

Taking the time to do it right will save you time

Reading the instructions can take a lot of time but it will make the time it will take to get it put together easier. Knowing what to do is half the battle. Whether it is how to put something together or how to get where you want to be, knowing what to do makes doing it easier. Knowing all the facts about anything is necessary to make the right decisions in Life. Otherwise you are simply making an uneducated guess. Some decisions you will have to make throughout your life are too important to just simply guess. We all have a built in warning system. So if you feel uneasy deep down inside, don't assume it is gas. If it is an important decision then you know it is important to get all the facts before you make your decision. Because once you act on it you have to live with the consequences. Deciding what you should do is a lot easier then deciding how to fix the problem created by guessing. I am bringing this up because I did what looked like the right thing to do, but it turned out to be the opposite of what I should have done. Unfortunately my built in warning system didn't go off. If it looks good to be true then it probably isn't true. And looking into someone's eyes to see if their telling the truth doesn't work. In the good old days people would say a person is only as good as his word and a handshake meant they would do what they said they would. Today people say....you can't believe a word anyone says and a handshake has nothing to do with anything. Sometimes a short cut will only leave you to a dead end. Honesty is the best policy. Unfortunately not everyone is an honest person so be honest with yourself that you can't believe it until you see it.

Wednesday, January 1, 2020

Some things you do for yourself

If someone you know needs help, you help. If it is something that you you know needs done, you make sure it gets done. Don't forget how important it is to take the time to occasionally do something for yourself, just cause you should. We all have busy schedules and lots of responsibilities. But to enjoy life while you are living you have to squeeze in some time every now and then, to do what you enjoy. That's not being selfish, it is necessary. In order to be able to take care of everything else and everyone else, you have to first take care of yourself, so that you can. Happy New year everyone. Make 2020 the best it can be and take care of yourself so you can be the best you can be.